Sometimes there is just nothing to do at 3am on a Sunday but blog. I have been extremely silent lately because not only have I become more ill resulting in a short hospital stay I also took up a new pen pal. Having someone interested in everything again really makes one neglect the cathartic activity of blogging. Slowly but surely the past few months I noticed some odd changes in my health. My hair became smooth and fine again like before I had thyroid disease. I seemed to feel thinner but there was a major Kablam! Around the corner. Normally I am extremely sensitive to heat so when I had some miserable days in a row and began complaining I expected the guys comeback to be about cost efficiency. Instead he showed me the thermostat was barely under 80 degrees. Its been impossible since to concentrate without a fan on me at all times.
For three nights in a row I had a racing heartbeat and some fluttering. I falsely assumed that perhaps my blood levels were to low a month before I return to the hematologist. When the pace didn't slow on the third night I went to the emergency room. An EKG and portable chest xray later I was admitted for a short stay. The electrocardiogram didn't seem to show anything major but I am fitted for thirty days with a heart monitor. I can take it off on September 10th which is not soon enough considering the rash, broken skin and scaring I am getting from the adhesive sensors. What's more troubling to me is that neither my general physician or the endocrinologist know what to do for me. Obviously a bad thyroid could be first in line for causing a random heart event.
The more worrisome thing to me is the hyperactive response of my gastrointestinal tract. I can't seem to eat more than 900 calories a day so my weight has dropped about 15lbs in a month or less. Food is barely being digested or at least my system in entirety is moving at warp speed. Its funny how weight comes off a person. I can see it in my feet and face a new slenderness but there's so much padding everywhere else it would take a larger amount to see much different. My hips seem to have lost a few inches and my stomach is firmer which I imagine means its shrinking. There has been a promise for awhile now that most of my pain and diseases will disappear if I lose weight. That's a big lie of course but I guess some functionality would change.
What does seem to be true is that I am taking another step down the independence ladder. Very soon I won't be able to reach the rung for a future profession let alone a doctorate degree at all. It scares me but I also am enough of a realist to realize that still leaves me with a lot. My feet however would disagree as the pain has been getting worse. I really don't focus on them enough but the right has developed severe tension pain in the long bones. September will be followups for all of my doctors including a return to the opthalmologist. With the headaches and eye strain I've been having I wanted to wait until he confirms I don't have inflammation again before I purchase new glasses. I'll be glad to get them however since my spare pair are barely usable do to my poor judgment in frame size as well as large scratches. I can feel fall finally coming in my bones and I'll be happy for the cool air. At the moment I feel like the surface of Mars crying out for cooling rain.
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